Thursday, April 11, 2013

When life gets in the way

There is no way around it.... I have been slacking! Hardcore slacking, like not running in 2 weeks and barely getting to the gym type slacking. In the past three weeks I have only attempted to run once and made it to the gym only a handful of times. This is a definite issue because today my wonderful friend reminded me that I only have 4 weeks until I am running a 10K in Grand Rapids. No I know I have ran further than that but I am not at the point where I can just go out and run 6 miles without proper training.

I have also been slacking on the food front, the last few weeks have been crazy busy and I have really quickly lost motivation to prepare and plan for meals ahead of time. The BF and I are usually really good about planning but in the last few weeks we have lost it. Most days I can find something to eat for breakfast and lunch (although quite boring) however dinners have been mostly eating out and take-out which is not usual at all!

So what is my excuse? Change and uncertainty, which are two things that I do not tend to enjoy.

So first I am moving which has two huge pieces of chaos. The first is that the BF and I have decided to live with each other for the summer to save money and to kinda do a "trial run". For most people this would be exciting however for me it is terrifying. I lived with someone in the past and it didn't work out well at all, it is actually what led to our break-up so going into it this time is a little scary. I may be over there all the time but I know firsthand it is a huge difference then actually living with each other. The second piece of chaos is that after the summer I will be taking over the lease from my current roomie in our new house which is still to be located (with less than 2 weeks until we move out). Finding a house/apartment is a pain in the a** and every time we find something we love it is leased before we even have the chance. We have a few more places to look at this week and hopefully we will find something so we can get it done with!

And the next and biggest part of life right now is that the BF has decided to attend grad school at the University of Minnesota. Since we began dating over a year ago I knew he wanted to go to grad school full time which is something I 100% support. I know he is meant to do big things in the business world and the only way to get there is for him to get his MBA from a reputable school. He applied to 2 schools in Michigan and 1 in Minnesota (his home state) because they were the best in the Midwest. After a few months of interviews and campus tours he finally decided on Minnesota. I know in my heart that it is the best school for him and the place he will excel the most which is what is important but it still does bring on a lot of stress that I wasn't prepared for. We have already discussed that we are in this for the long haul but it has now made the next 2.5 years very uncertain. Because of my job and his first year course load we have decided to do long distance for the first year, LDR's suck there is no way around it and historically I haven't been very good at them. I am a time person and I feel most loved when I am given someone’s time which is something the BF will not be able to provide his first year. Since we both know this the current plan is for me to make the move in spring of 2014, which will solve one set of problems but bring on a whole new set. I love my job, and to be honest I am damn good at it. I have excelled faster than most employees and have the potential to excel well into management and a six figure income in the next few years. Working for the federal government means that there is usually a lot of room to transfer but sadly there is nothing in Minnesota. This means that I will be starting over new, and will be switching from the public to the private sector which will be huge! I know that in the end this is what will be best for the BF and I since it will give us the life we both want but in the mean time I am just trying by best not to freak out and be supportive as possible even when it hurts.

So what is the outcome? That I need to pull up my big girl panties and suck it up. If I can't keep to my goals during this type of stress there is no way that I will be able to keep it up later in life with kids, a house, a hubby, hopefully a few dogs, and lord knows what else. I need to make working out and eating right a priority because it will make everything else in my life just a little bit better. Today I packed my food and I have a great meal planned for tonight, this weekend I am hoping to unwind and just enjoy my friends and BF. This weekend I plan to make a weekly meal plan and grocery list to try to keep myself more organized so that I can't blame time anymore. I guess it took me 3 weeks but I guess this morning was my realization that I need to make some changes!!

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